You know how in new relationships you advance from like to like-like, and then, if you're lucky, from like-like to love. Hopefully, that's where it ends, but the reality is most relationships then progress from love back to barely like and then to loathe.

Well, this describes perfectly my relationship with MySpace. Within the span of about a month, I went from liking MySpace to loathing it. I still have my MySpace profile active (feel free to befriend me), but only to direct prospective readers to my other blog.

I reluctantly joined Facebook in rebellion against MySpace, and over the course of a couple of months, I went from liking Facebook, to like-liking Facebook, to loving Facebook. I don't want that to change, but I must confess...

Last week I was shot (in the back mind you) in a water gun fight by our church's Youth Pastor (not our Children's Pastor, which happens to be my lovely wife). I was targeted with a rubber ducky squirting dirty toilet water. Imagine my surprise when, while sitting in my office slaving away on legal matters of the utmost importance, I get squirted from cyberspace with dirty toilet water.

Fair enough, I can understand a Youth Pastor being into childish games (it goes with the territory, I suppose), so I shot back in kind with like weapon (a rubber ducky also happens to be my daughter Libby's favorite toy, so it was fitting). I've also begrudgingly participated in a variety of other Facebook phenomena (25 things, Networked Blogs here and here, please feel free to join either or both, and others), all in good fun.

But, I draw the line at being shot (by our Youth Pastor, again) with a Tiger Shot Blaster filled with hot sauce and an ALL CAPS "SPLAT!!!"

To think of grown men behaving in such a way! Besides, I will have ample opportunity to return the favor this weekend when the guy's from our church engage in good, Christian fellowship by shooting each other with automatic weapons loaded with paint bullets.

I now swear off such Facebook silliness in an attempt to maintain what little social networking dignity I have left. So, feel free to shoot me, tag me, poke me or otherwise try to enlist me in mindless trifle, but I refuse to retaliate, tattoo my profile, display gaudy symbols, join every cause that comes my way, or waste perfectly good hot sauce.

However, you are cordially invited to join this blog's Facebook Network and participate in dignified Facebook applications.